Episode 16-Satan's Blade

Segment One

	(Jason is sitting in the chair, fanning himself. Joe Cocker's "Summer In The City" is playing. He looks around.)
	Jason: Cokie? Where are you? And turn off this ironic song, it isn't helping!
	(Cokie appears and his tongue is extremely large. Jason looks at it.)
	Jason: My god, is that your tongue?
	Cokie (Talking in a lisp): Yes Jason, it's extremely hot in here.
	Jason: Oh, right and dogs sweat from their tongues. Let me ask Snyder what's up with the heat? Snyder!
	(Goes to Snyder and he is not only wearing a coat but is wrapped in a blanket, shivering. He looks at the camera.)
	Snyder: What do you want, Soto??
	Jason: I'm wondering why it's so hot down here.
	Snyder: Hot?? I'm freezing!! I don't know how you can be hot!! 
	Cokie: Are you thucking nuts?
	Snyder: NO!! Chickie's cold too, aren't you Chickie?
	(Chickie is wearing a stocking hat and a scarf.)
	Snyder: See??
	Jason: Man, you guys are crazy, it's the middle of July, almost August, you know!
	Snyder: So?? If you're that hot, there's one thing I can do.
	Jason: What's that?
	Snyder: Send you two a movie. (He picks up the movie) It's called "Satan's Blade". A movie about Satan should warm you up.
	Jason: Warm me up!! You...
	Cokie: Forget about it, Jason. Let's just go watch the movie.
	Jason: Hey, do me a favor and say "I was born on a pirate ship".
	Cokie: "I was born on a pile of..." HEY!!!
	Jason: He-he, let's go watch the movie.

Segment Two

	(The camera is pointed down to the ground. Jason steps in.)

	Jason: Boy, this movie is really bad, huh Cokie?
	(Cokie's feet are shown.)
	Cokie: Yeah. And what was up with that beginning with only showing feet?
	Jason: I think it's called "a payoff", where they were trying to surprise us by that shocking twist.
	Cokie: Oh. Well, it was long and stupid.
	Jason: Tell me about it. Man it's hot down here, I might just take my shirt off.
	Cokie: Go ahead. Nothing I haven't seen before.
	Jason: Thanks. (A shirt falls to the floor by Jason's feet) 
	Cokie: Damn Jason! Your back hair grew!
	Jason: Aw damn it! I try to keep that down, no wonder I'm so hot. 
	Cokie: You need me to shave your entire back again?
	Jason: Yeah, let me get out of these shorts and put a towel on. (Shorts fall to the ground. Cokie yells) What?!
	Cokie: You're naked!!
	Jason: Oh calm down, like you haven't seen me naked before!!
	Cokie: OH god!!!
	Jason: Oh wait, you haven't.
	(Goes to Dr. Snyder's feet and Chickie's feet.)
	Snyder: Will you two knock that off and get back into the theater!!
	Jason: Oh fine!! Let's go.
	Cokie: Put some clothes back on first!! You hairy freak.

Segment Three

	(Cokie is at the table. Jason sneaks up behind him in a mask. Then he jumps out and yells BOO!!)
	Cokie: Not funny Jason!
	Jason: Aw come on, how'd you know it was me?
	Cokie: Your odor gave you away.
	(Jason takes off mask.)
	Jason: That's not funny.
	(Cokie screams and leaves.)
	Jason: Ok, that's really not funny either. And we gotta get back to the movie. Which really isn't funny at all.

Segment Four

	(Cokie is sitting on the table. He sighs. Jason walks in, putting on a jacket.)
	Jason: Well, I'm ready, let's go fishing.
	Cokie: I don't feel like fishing today.
	Jason: But...you said you wanted me to teach you how to fish.
	Cokie: I dont think I'll be good company today. You go ahead without me.
	Jason: Ok. I'll be by the lake if you need me.
	(Jason walks out. Cokie sighs again)
	(Dr. Snyder and Chickie sit down.)
	Snyder: Boy, it sure is cold! (Looks at camera) What's wrong, Cokie?
	Cokie: Ohh...nothing.
	(Shot of Chickie. Snyder looks down at him.)
	Snyder: Alright, fine, I'll go upstairs. I need to change socks.
	(Snyder leaves.)
	Cokie: Chickie, you and Dr. Snyder have a good relationship going on. How come me and Jason can't get that?
	(Shot of Chickie)
	Cokie: Yeah, maybe I should be more open to him. 
	(Shot of Chickie)
	Snyder (From off camera): Where's the socks again? (Silence) Where on the shelf??
	Cokie: So what should I do, Chickie?
	(Shot of Chickie)
	Cokie: Ok, I'm watching.
	(Snyder walks in with a pair of socks.)
	Snyder: These were the only pair I could find and...what's that? You...really?
	(Snyder drops the socks and grabs Chickie and starts kissing him very passionately. They fall to the floor.)
	Cokie: You're right!!!!
	(Jason walks in.)
	Jason: Not a bite!! Not even a nibble!! Maybe I should try some bait...
	(Cokie jumps up to Jason and starts kissing him. Jason is scared and pushes him off.)
	Jason: Cokie!!! What the hell are you doing???
	Cokie: I'm trying to bring our spark back into our relationship, councilor. Find me guilty of being super sexy and do me right here!!!
	Jason: Dear GOD!!!!!!!
	(Jason runs away)
	Cokie: Aw come on, Mr. D.A, I want you to charge me!!!!!

Segment Five

	(Jason is really hot and he looks up.)
	Jason: I wonder if something is blocking this air vent. If only I had a screwdriver.
	(From the front of the table, Satan's hand pops up, holding a screwdriver and he places it on the table. Satan's hand disappears.)
	Jason: Oh, hey, Satan's Screwdriver. 
	(Jason picks it up and he starts to twitch.)
	Jason (Echoing): I must...kill...you...all!!!!
	(Jason drops the screwdriver.)
	Jason: That was weird. (Wipes his forehead) If only I had a towel.
	(Satan's hand pops up again and puts a towel on the table. Satan's hand leaves.)
	Jason: Oh, Satan's Towel.
	(Jason picks it up and wipes his forehead.)
	Jason (echoing): You...all...must....die!!!!!
	(He drops the towel.)
	Jason: Man, why does that keep happening. If only I had something to drink.
	(Satan's hand pops up with a thing of orange juice and a glass. Satan pours the juice into the glass and then his hand goes back down.)
	Jason: Oh, Satan's Orange Juice.
	(Jason drinks the juice)
	Jason (While he's drinking): You...all..must...suffer!!!!!!
	(Jason puts the glass down.)
	Jason: That's better.
	(Cokie comes out of nowhere, lands on Jason's face, and they fall to the ground.)
	Jason: Cokie!! Stop it!!!!!!!!
	Cokie: If only I had a condom!
	(Satan's hand pops up and puts a condom on the table.)
	Cokie: Alright, Satan's Condom!
	Jason: NOOOO!!!!!!
	(Snyder and Chickie are lying next to each other under a blanket, smoking. "Let's Get It On" is playing.)
	
The End